The Baby, Part II

Bolting up in his chair, he runs his hands down his face as the doorbell chimes for the third time. Looking at the clock on the mantel, he sighs. He’s been asleep for just over an hour. But it’s late, and he can’t figure out who would be ringing the bell at that hour. Standing up, slightly uneasy and depressed that he’s been ripped from the dream, he yawns as he unlocks the door.

“Darling?”

~

The Baby, Part II

“No sir. It’s me. I’m sorry. I woke you didn’t I?” she questions, her arms wrapped around a brown paper bag. Yawning for the second time, he smiles weakly at her.

“No, not at all. Come in. Let me take that for you.” He says, as he takes the bag out of her arms and steps to the side so she can come in. Closing the door behind her, she follows him into the kitchen. Placing the bag on the table, he turns to look at her. “You’re soaking wet!” he proclaimed, as she looks down at her drenched self.

“Yes, I suppose I am.” She answers quickly, feeling terrible that after all his help that evening, she woke him up. “I’m so sorry I woke you up.” She adds as she feels herself blush slightly. “But once I got home, I couldn’t sleep. That’s when I realized that we hadn’t eaten and I was hungry, so I ran out to get something and figured that perhaps you’d like something too?” she questioned him hesitantly.

“That’s very thoughtful, thanks, but not needed. I told you I was glad to help.” He says, as he watches her begin to pull things out of the bag. “But you’re soaked. Why don’t you give me your things, change into your scrubs or something, and I’ll throw this stuff into the dryer. Your parents would kill me if you got sick because of this.” He says gently, as she nodded her head.

“That would be great. I’ll go grab my scrubs.” She answers as she heads for the office, but after a few moments she walked back into the kitchen empty handed. “I forgot. I wore them home the other night. I don’t have anything to change into. I snagged all my other clothes to switch out with other stuff.” She said, as he smiled at her.

“You’re welcomed to see if there is anything in the girl’s old rooms to borrow. I’m pretty sure you all wear pretty much the same sizes.” He answers her gently, as she nods her head once more. “While you look, what can I do to help?” he asks, nodding his head towards the bag on the table.

“If you’d set the oven to three –fifty, that would help a lot. It’s already been cooked, but I’ve got to reheat it.” She says as she opens the door to the first of the two bedrooms. “I should only be a few moments.” She adds, as he goes over and turns on the oven to the temperature she requested. A few moment later, she returns, but still in her wet clothes. 

"You didn't change." He states as he turns to look at her, but she's shaking her head.

"Nothing to change into." She replies. "But I'm fine. I can stay in what I'm in. It's no big deal." She adds, but he shakes his head.

"Not going to happen. Your parents would kill me if you get sick because of this." He says again, as he scratches his head thinking. "There might be something of her's still in my room if you want to look. Otherwise, we'll come up with something." He says as she looks at him surprised. Out of everything she ever expected to hear from him, that was not one of them.

"Okay then. Where in your room should I look?" she asks hesitantly, still unsure of what is going on. Walking past her, he leads her into his room before he points to a dresser near his bed.

"There might still be something in here of hers. Wear whatever you can find until your clothes are dry." He says before heading back into the kitchen to put what she brought into the oven to heat. 

~

Bustling around the kitchen a few minutes later, she sighs as she turns her back to the doorway and begins pour two glasses of milk to go with the baked macaroni she has in the oven warming. Coming into the kitchen, he sighs before he sees the outfit she was able to find. "That dress." he thinks to himself as he finds himself watching her bustling around. It had been a long time since he had seen her wear that dress and he sighs at the sight of her wearing it. It was lovely. That stunning orange that she looks so wonderful in and he can't help but want to comment about it how wonderful it is to see her wearing that again, but before he got to speak, she turns around to look at him.

"Are you alright sir?" she questions him, as he shakes his head. 

"Huh? Oh yeah. I'm fine. What smells so good?" he asks quickly as he realizes that it's not his wife, but the young girl instead. 

"Baked macaroni. I hope that's alright." She answers as he sits down at the table to watch her pull it out of the oven and set it on the table. "I just had a taste for it and Giant Eagle had some made tonight." She added as he smiled. 

"That sounds wonderful." He says as she dishing out a plate for him and sets it in front him before sitting down. "You know, it's funny that you were able to pick that dress tonight." He says, as she looks up at him.

"Oh? Why is that?" She questions him, as she cuts into her macaroni.

"I was thinking about a time when she wore it earlier. We were having our pictures taken for the church directory. Wonderful day actually. That's when we found out that we were pregnant too." He answered, as she looked down at the dress. It was simple and very pretty. 

"Well, thank you for allowing me to wear it while my clothes dry." She said politely as she took another bite. "I'll make sure it gets hung back up before I leave." She added, as she heard the dryer's time go off upstairs. "I should go change. I like fresh out of the dryer clothes." 

"Oh. Okay." He replied softly, as he watches her stand up and walk past him to head upstairs. After she left the room, he sighed. Perhaps his comment was too embarrassing for her.

~

One Week Later

Walking into the living room of the funeral home, the car seat dangling off her arm, she smiles. It's the happiest she's been all week. "Guess who came back to visit." She says in a sing-song voice as he walks into the kitchen and see's her taking the baby out of his car seat. "Say hi little guy." She playful teases the baby as she waves his little arm towards the boss. 

"Hi there buddy." He says as he turns to look at her. "Are you able to do something for me?" he asks her as she smiles at him, the baby now tight in her arms and being peppered with kisses.

"Yeah, sure." She says as he hands her the paper with what he needs as watches her walk into the office, the baby and her smiling. 

~

"It's that wonderful time of the night." She says about two hours later, as she holds a screaming two month old in her arms. "Would you mind again?" she asks, as he sits down and looks at her, a smile on his face. 

"Not at all." He says as she places the baby in his waiting arms and hands him a warm bottle, but even tonight he has a hard time feeding the baby and so the little one screams most of the night. Handing her the baby about forty-five minutes later, she sits in the rocker he brought up for her and watches as she rocks the baby back and forth with hopes of soothing his cries. As he lulls into sleep, she lays him down on his blanket and lays with him, her hand rubbing his tummy. Soon she finds herself dozing along side the baby, and as she falls asleep, he can't help but notice, and now it is his turn to smile and he knows that his comments about her being a good mother are a hundred percent correct. Waking up a few moments later, she stretches as she looks down at the little one, still asleep next to her. Looking up at him, she smiles.

"How long was I out?" she asks softly, as he smiles at her. 

"Not long. A few minutes." He replies, as he helps her off the floor and onto the couch next to him. "Want some more wine?" he asks, as he hands her her barely touched glass. Taking a few sips she sighs. 

"I have no clue what's gotten into him tonight. Its so weird that even you can't him to drink a bottle tonight. I know he must be hungry, but I'm out of ideas here. Advice?" she asks him, but he merely shakes his head. He too is out of ideas. 

~

"He's teething." He says about an hour later, as she walks into the living room. Sitting down on the couch next to him, she looks at him.

"How can you tell?" she asks, genuinely concerned about this. Smiling, he looks down at the baby.

"He keeps sucking on my finger. I've been slipping him the bottle every few moments, but he doesn't seem to want it. But he likes my finger. I'm telling you, he's most likely teething." He answers, as she looks over at the baby and seeing him happily sucking away. "It's a little early, but if I had to put money down on it, I'd vote teething." He added, as she nodded her head.

"I think he's old enough to start teething." She says, as she walks into the office and pulls a book off her desk. Flipping through it, she finds what's she's looking for. "Everything he's been doing tonight would suggest it." She adds as she silently reads the symptoms of teething. "It may seem a bit early, but I'd have to agree." 

"I'm sure his mother won't appericate that if she's breastfeeding." He says as she begins to smile. 

"I never thought about that." she says, as she sits down on the couch and leans against him to look at the baby. "Whose a little cutie pie?" she cooed at the baby, as he smiles weakly. Realizing how she was sitting, she quickly leans back and smiles weakly at him. "I'm sorry sir. I wasn't thinking." 

"No problem. Really." He answers as she smiles at her gently. "He's too cute to stay away from." He added as her cell phone goes off. Picking it up, she sighs. "Oh, look at your aunt." He says softly to the baby. "All business like. We must break her of that, and I think you'll be the perfect one to do that." 

"It was his mom. They aren't able to pick him up, so she'd like to know if we can take him home. I told her that wasn't a problem." She says as he nods his head and hands her the baby. 

"Not at all.I'll drive though. Don't need you to try and take care of him and drive at the same time." He says quickly as she turns to look at him. She wasn't expecting him to drive them. 

"I appericate that, but it's not needed sir." She says quickly, but he shakes his head. 

"Not an option tonight. It's raining and a crying baby can be detracting. I'm driving. That's final." And his tone of voice says just that. Shaking her head, she sighs and together they head down to take the little one home. 

~

Dropping the baby off about twenty minutes later, she sighs, as she climbs back into the car. "Homeward bound." She says jokingly as he smiles. It sounds like a wonderful plan to him. Pulling up in front of her house about ten minutes later, he sighs. 

"Good night." He says pleasantly, as she smiles at him. 

"Good night. You won't be disappointed if I don't show up tonight with dinner will you?" she asks, referring to the last time they babysat. 

"Not at all. You need some sleep. I'll see you in the morning." He says, as she grabs her books and heads towards her house. As she closes the door, he sighs again before heading off alone into the night.   

The Baby, Part I

The Baby, Part I

As she walked back and forth in the living room of the funeral home, her girlfriend’s two month old son crying in her arms, he couldn't help but smile as he thought of the countless times he had done the same thing with his own cherished group.

“Hey, come on now. It’s really not that bad.” She cooed at the baby, attempting to sooth his cried, but it didn't work. The little boy simple refused to settle down. Turning around to look at him, she sighed, and he could see the faint look of panic in her tired eyes. “I don’t know what else to do.” She said, as he smiled at her, understanding where she was coming from. “I've tried everything, but he keeps trying to latch on to me.” She cried, as she sat down on the couch next to him. “He needs to eat, but I just can’t get him to take the bottle. I think it’s because she breastfeeds him, and I’m a woman.” She added, as she looked over at him, wanting to ask him for help, but afraid to. But as the little one continued to cry in her arms, she knew she had no choice but to ask him. “Would you mind trying to get him to take his bottle?” she asked hesitantly, as he tried hard not to laugh, since he’d been waiting for her to ask him for help. Nodding his head, he smiled.

“I’d be happy to.” He replied as she gently passed him the baby and he cradled him in his arms, as she handed him the bottle and watched the baby happily latch onto it and began drinking and she found herself sighing in relief. Leaning back into the couch, she found herself admiring how comfortable he was with the baby. It had been at least twenty some-odd years since he himself would have had a baby this small to take care of, and that thought made her look over at the secretary in the corner of the living room where the lone picture of him and his beloved late wife stood and she immediately felt terrible as she tried to ponder what must have been going through his mind while he fed the baby. Would this bring back memories for him that could cause him pain?

“He’s almost done with this bottle. You might want to get another bottle ready if you've got one.” He said, pulling her back to reality as she turned and looked at him, her eyes scanning his face for any sign that he was having a hard time mentally with all this.

“Huh? Oh right. I’ll go get it ready.” She muttered as she walked into the kitchen to warm the next bottle. “You know, they’re going to be a while yet, and this is the last bottle I have here for him. I’m gonna run to the house and pick up another bottle, just in case. Will you two be alright?” she asked a few moments later as she handed him the bottle.

“That’s a good idea. Take the new van and be careful. The roads appear to be getting pretty bad.” He said in a father-like tone. Pulling on her coat, she placed a gentle kiss on the baby’s head.

“Are you sure you two will be okay?” she asked again, as he looked up at her and smiled. “Because I can always just stay here if you don’t want to be alone. I know he’s been a lot of work tonight.”

“We’ll be okay. Don’t worry. Just be careful.” He said gently as she nodded her head and walked out, closing the door behind her. With a smile on his face, he looked down at the baby. “You've got a wonderful aunt there little guy. She loves you like you were her own.” He said as he adjusted the baby in his arms. It had been a long time since he had held such a small baby in his arms for any length of time. “She’ll make a wonderful mother too some day. You mark my words on that one little man.” He added a moment later as he looked over at the photograph on the secretary. It was the only one he had in the room of him and his beautiful wife alone. Letting out a sigh, he couldn't help but realize just how much he was missing his beloved, and as his gaze went across the mantel filled with photos of their own group, he couldn't help but smile as he looked down again at the one in his arms.

~

After a second bottle and almost half of a third one, he smiled as the baby snuggled up against his cheek and fell asleep in his arms. It again, had been something else that had been awhile since anyone, wife or child, had done that and he couldn't help but smile at the thought of it. Looking over at her, she smiled as she turned away from the program they were watching.

“Would you like me to take him?” she questioned in a motherly-wife kind of way, almost like his beloved would have asked all those years ago. Looking at the clock, he realized just how long he had been the little tike.

“No that’s okay.” He replied, as he watched her smile and snuggle back into the couch to continue watching the TV show. After a few moments, she looked over at him and couldn't help but smile as she realized that both he and the baby were sound asleep. Reaching over her head, she grabbed her phone and silenced it before pulling up the camera and snapping the picture-perfect moment. Setting the phone back down on the table next to her, she sighed as she admired him. How many times at night when he was a young father had his wife found him asleep on the couch with one of their children? She could only figure it must have been hundred’s of times, as she figured he would have been nothing less than a hands-on father. Glancing back to the program, she heard his familiar sigh of him waking up, and out of the corner of her eye, she noticed him shift ever so gently.

“His parents should be here soon.” She said softly, as she saw him frown ever so slightly. Was he enjoying this? Or was that a frown of sadness because he realized that the baby in his arms wasn't his and that she wasn't his wife? Biting her lower lip, she resisted the urge to ask him.

“Okay.” He answered softly, as he yawned and felt the baby stir in his arms. Running his hand up and down the baby’s back, he felt the little one slip right back into sleep. It was an old trick that he use to use on his own and he was glad to see that it still worked all these years later. But he continued to frown slightly as he heard the slamming of a car door and the door leading to his private residence opening. “I think your friends are here.” He said, as she nodded her head.

“Come on in.” she called, as he watched the door open and a very attractive couple walked into the living room. “Hey. How was the dinner?” she asked pleasantly as she began to talk with couple.

“It was boring. I was excited to leave. How was he?” her friend replied, nodding her head towards him and the baby. “I missed him.”

“He was great. I don’t know about him, but I enjoyed it. I took pictures and video. I’ll put them up on Facebook for you.” She answered, as he found himself smiling.

“I loved having him. He’s welcomed back anytime.” He quickly interjected, though not a hundred percent sure that she was referring to him. Handing the sleeping boy to hid father, he waved goodbye. “Thanks for having here baby sit.” He added as he silently watched them put him in the car seat for the ride home.

“I’ll be right up.” She said a moment later, as she followed her friends out the door. As he listened to the mumbled conversation and the clicking of the girl’s heels on the steps, he couldn't help but sigh painfully. He failed at not getting attached to the baby. No, that wasn't right. He was sighing because he had fallen into a fantasy world that he thought he’d never have to come back out of.

“Wish you were here.” He muttered to the photo in the distance as she walked back into the room and closed the door, jarring him from his thoughts.

“Well that was fun but I don’t have any idea how to even begin thanking you for tonight.” She said, as she sat down next to him on the couch and yawned. “I really don’t know how to thank you.” She repeated as he smiled at her.

“Don’t worry about it. Really. It was my pleasure.” He said as he transferred the phones to the answering service before he put his cell phone in his shirt pocket. “Now come on. How about I give you a lift home. Save your parents from having to come get you.”

“That would be super.” She said, as she pulled back on her coat and followed him out the door.

~

Coming home about a half hour later, he sighed as he locked the door and sat down in his lazy boy. He was exhausted and at the same point, he couldn't help but shake the fact that he had come back into reality. He adored the couple of hours he had with the baby and was grateful that she had her friends drop the little one off at the funeral home. But now, he couldn't help but miss the fact that his beautiful wife wasn't there. Sighing for what had to be the thousandth time that day, he stretched out in his chair and listened to the clock chiming as he drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

~

“Sweetheart? Can you grab the baby? I have my hands full.” He heard her call from the kitchen as he darted into the living room to see his daughter crying in her playpen. Shaking his head, he bent down, picked the crying child up and cradled her in his arms, rocking back and forth trying to sooth her.

“Really now baby girl. It’s not that bad.” He cooed at the baby, as he thumbed away the falling tears from her eyes. “I promise it’s not that bad.” He added as he held her close against his chest and kissed her forehead as she settled down. Sighing softly, he walked into the kitchen of their apartment and smiled as he watched his beautiful wife make dinner.

“Did you grab her?” she asked over her shoulder as she picked up a pot and began to pour its contents into a strainer in the sink. Placing a peck on her cheek, he smiled.

“I've got her love. She’s okay. Now, what can I help with?” he asked, as he shifted the baby in his arms so he could place his free hand in the small of his wife’s back as she moved the pot back onto the stove and began to stir in the cheese for the macaroni.

“Nothing, but I’m sorry that this isn't more romantic, but somebody wouldn't let me get anything done today.” She replied as she placed a loving kiss on her daughter’s nose before looking up at her husband.

“Who said mac and cheese isn't romantic?” he questioned, as he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her in as close as he could before he leaned down and kissed her softly, their hands meeting on her womb where their second child was. “Just being here with you is romantic enough, huh little one?” he asked his daughter, who smiled at her parents.

“Mama!” she squealed, as they both laughed, before she was showered in quick little kisses from her parents.

“You two are so sweet.” His wife purred at him a moment later. “But it’s still so hard to imagine that in just a few weeks, we’ll have a second one to deal with.” She added, as she slipped out of his grasp and picked up the pot once more to begin dishing out dinner. Setting the baby down in her high chair, he took the pot out of her hands.

“Scared?” he questioned gently, as he put equal amounts in both their bowls and then some in the baby’s bowl. Setting the pot back on the stove, he smiled as he pulled out her chair and helped her to sit, before he turned away once more to light a handful of candles he had pulled out to place on the table. As he lit the last one, he put them in front of them, flipped off the light switch and sat down, his hand going back onto her womb.

“No, because I have you. What on earth are you doing?” she asked, as she felt him rubbing his hand gently over hers, her wedding band sliding around on her finger.

“Reminding you of how much I love you and how wonderful you really are.” He whispered, as he placed his hand on her cheek and she turned to look at him, both of them forgetting their daughter and her bowl of mac and cheese. Looking into her eyes, he smiled. “The mother of my children…I can’t help but confess just how much I’m in love with you my dearest.”

“And neither can I my darling. I love you too.” She answered, before her eye caught the clock on the wall. Turning to look at him, glowing from the light of the candles and her pregnancy, she had a look in her eyes that he knew all too well. “Why don’t we put the baby down for the night and then finish dinner in front of the fireplace?” she suggested, knowing that he wasn't about to refuse the offer. Shaking his head, he looked over at their daughter, her bowl of mac and cheese long since flipped over in the excitement of watching her parents in love. Laughing, he picked up the squealing child.

“I’ll get her changed if you want to get the bottle ready.” He spoke, as he headed off towards his office that doubled as the nursery, while his wife quickly and silently pulled together and warmed the cereal bottle they would give the baby every night. After five or six minutes, she walked into the nursery, bottle in hand and stood in the doorway admiring how quickly he had picked up on being a hands-on father. Laying the baby down, an agreement he had made right before she was born, that he would be home every night in time for bed, he covered her up with the fleece blanket his parents gave them for a baby shower present and kissed her on the forehead. “Good night little one.” He whispered softly, as he placed the bottle right next to her before turning off the light and closing the door, the clock on the mantel chiming out the hour. It was later then he had thought. Turning around to face his beautiful pregnant wife, he pulled her back into his arms once more and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “I love you so much right now.” He whispered as he felt the baby kick against the hand that he had placed on her womb. “More than you’ll ever know.” He added, placing his lips gently on hers and began to kiss her passionately before she pushed against him.

“The doorbell is ringing.” She whispered into his ear, as he kissed her neck, leaving soft little marks where he’d been.

“It can wait.” He whispers back, as it chimes again…though not as far off in the distance as it should be.

~

Bolting up in his chair, he runs his hands down his face as the doorbell chimes for the third time. Looking at the clock on the mantel, he sighs. He’s been asleep for just over an hour. But it’s late, and he can’t figure out who would be ringing the bell at that hour. Standing up, slightly uneasy and depressed that he’s been ripped from the dream, he yawns as he unlocks the door.

“Darling?”

To Be Continued...

Strohs, Darts and Engagements

Taking another swig from her bottle of Stroh's, she sighed. She was exhausted. Leaning back in her bar stool, she glanced over at the couple who were shooting pool a few feet away, and allowed her mind to drift back to that afternoon where she had won two rounds of pool against one of the guys from the funeral home.

"Did I just hear him right?" The man sitting across from her asked, breaking her train of thought. "Did he just say they were playing for her phone number?"

"Yup. Dating isn't what it was when you were dating sir. Wish it still was." She sighed, taking another swig. "Unless its me, then dating doesn't exist."

"Oh? What makes you say that?" he questioned, as he stabbed a meatball and popped it in his mouth. "You're a very attractive young lady, with a great head. You'd be a wonderful catch for any man." He stated, as she took another drink.

"Not working in a funeral home I'm not. Guys get freaked out when I tell them I work with the dead. It's like I have a disease or something." She replied, as she took a bite from her sandwich. "And if they aren't freaked out, its because they're already in the business and already understand working with the dead." She added, as she looked back over that the couple.

"That can't be true." He answered, as she turned back around to look at him.

"Oh, why wouldn't it be?" she asked amused now. "If you look at my track record, it isn't wonderful I'm afraid. The guy I was dating in high school couldn't remember who his girlfriend was. After that, there was Zach who wanted to move super quick..." She said as she sighed. "But regardless..." She started before trailing off and having another swig of beer.

"Regardless?" he questioned her, prompting her to continue, but no luck. She just shook her head and went back to watching the couple shooting pool.

~

"How did you meet your wife?" she questioned about an hour later, as they finished their dinners and were now throwing darts. 

"You know how." He answered, before he turned and smiled at her. "But okay. If you insist. You know that she's his cousin and I met her at his wedding. We started dating a few weeks after the wedding." He added, as she nodded her head and threw a dart at the board. 

"So how did you know she was "the one"?" she questioned, as she handed him the darts and marked down her score. 

"Just did." He replied. "So I asked her to marry me." 

"Did you do the whole down on one knee thing?" she asked, now intently listening. He normally never went into detail like it sounded like he was about to do right now.

"No. I kept it simple. I just told her I loved her and asked her to marry me." He answered, as he threw his last dart and they walked over to the board to see how he had done. 

"Did you ask her dad for her hand first?" she questioned. "Because after my failed engagement, I highly recommend that to anyone." She added, as he smiled.

"No I didn't actually. We told our parents the following weekend actually. We took them out to dinner, I think it was the same place actually that we held our wedding reception, and we told them that we were engaged." He said, and she could see the hints of him actually remembering the moment. 

"That sounds nice. How did they take it?" she asked, as she took a drink from her bottle.

"They asked if we were in trouble actually, as we hadn't been dating very long before I asked her." He said nonchalantly, as she choked on her beer. Turning to look at her, he had a faint smile on his lips.

"They actually thought you might have gotten her pregnant?" she asked, surprised. "You hadn't, had you? Wait, never mind. I shouldn't have asked that." She quickly added, but he continued to smile.

"They did, and no I didn't. But back then, the only reason one got married quickly after dating for such a short amount of time was if the girl was pregnant. It wasn't so in our case, but looking back now, it was funny that they would think that." He told her, as she laughed as her phone rang. Looking down at the caller id, she sighed. It was her brother with the body they had sent him to get. "Time to get back?" he asked, as she nodded her head sadly. She was enjoying herself. 

"Yeah. They're at 117th street." She said sadly as he smiled, finished his drink and handed her the darts. 

"Then we should take off. We told them we'd meet them there." He said, as they headed for the bar to close out the tab and then headed out the door back to work once more.  

Plight of Preteritus

Friday, 11 October 2013
2200 hours

As she walked into the living room of her grandmother's house, a towel wrapped loosely around her hair from her shower, she smiled. "Have I missed the news yet?" she asked causally as she sat down in the first open chair and relaxed.

"It's just coming on now." Her grandma replied, as she shook her head. "Did you want to watch it?"

"Unless there's something you wanted to watch." She replied, as the news started and her grandmother shook her head no. "Then the news it is." She said, as the words BREAKING NEWS flashed across the screen. "Ah yes, what a way to start the evening..."she said as she picked up the remote to turn the volume up.

"This just in...a local Catholic Priest is in jail this evening..." The local news anchor said, as she sighed. "Hmm. Wonder if its anybody I know..." she said as they continued with the story. As a photo splashed up on the screen, she gasped. "OH MY GOD!" Jumping out of her chair, she picked up the phone and dialed the funeral home as fast as her fingers would allow her. As it was answered, she began talking, not even waiting for her boss's brother to finish he greeting. "Where is he?" she demanded.

"He ran out."

"Does he know about father?" she questioned, as she heard the man on the other line sigh.

"Yeah. The girls already called him earlier when they saw it on the news." He replied, as she sank into the couch. "How did you hear about it?"

"It was breaking news on 8." She replied. "Have him call me later." she added seconds later, before hanging up the phone, her body surely going into shock. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't be.

~

Saturday, 12 October 2013

0900 hours

Coming into work, her hair down covering her face from the exhaustion and the fact that she had spent a good part of the night before crying, she stepped into the office and saw him already pounding away on the keyboard in front of him. Punching in, she sighed. 

"Morning." 

But it was greeted with a nod of his head. 

"Did you happen to hear about father?" She questioned, already knowing the answer, but again, he merely nodded his head at her, as she sat down at her desk. "It isn't true is it?" she asked, her voice now just above a whisper. Trying hard not to look at her, afraid perhaps to see the hurt, surprised and confusion in her eyes, he looked over at her, his eyes never meeting hers. She deserved an answer.

"I'm afraid it is." He said gently as she shook her head, the tears pooling in them.

"It can't be. It just can't be. He would never...it's a mistake..." She started, but he shook his head, her questions echoing his own. "Why?"

"That's the question we all want to know." He said, as he sighed. "But regardless of that, we have a lot going on today, so as hard as it is for you, I need you to focus the best you can on the here and now." He added softly, as he looked up at her, her face covered in hundreds of expressions at once. "Can you do that for me?"

"Yes." She answered, as she took the pad he had picked up, a list of stuff he needed done, wrote on it. Looking down at the list, she sighed. How could he, of all people, be so calm about what had just happened to someone that he loved and cared about, almost as much as she did?

~

Saturday, 12 October 2013

1100 hours

"I have a parishioner on the phone. She heard about father and wants to know what we know about masses this weekend. What should I tell her?" she asked him about two hours later, as she pulled him off to the side and away from the visitation going on.

"Call sister and find out. Use her cell phone. I'm sure she won't be answering the church phone." He answered softly as she nodded her head.

"Why are they calling here? Why would we know what's going on?" she asked quickly.

"Because they figure if I don't know what's going on, nobody else will either." He replied as he headed back to the visitation as she headed for the office. In a strange way, she supposed that his reply made sense.

~

Sunday, 13 October 2013

2100 hours

Sitting at her desk the next night, working late and tears dried up for the moment, she found herself worrying about him. He hadn't said much in the past forty-eight hours about what was happening since Saturday morning, and she worried that perhaps he simply was going to ignore the entire thing. She was confused, and felt worse then she had ever remembered in her life, but still, other than the man she called her pastor, her concerns were only for her boss. How was he handling this? What was he thinking? Was he going to pull through all this, especially since he was so close to father? She knew that only time would tell. 

Coming into the office, he sighed. It had been a horrible and long weekend, and as he sat down at his desk, he knew there was only one thing he could do. Flipping open the Rolodex, he found the card for the church and silently picked up the phone and dialed the number he wanted. After a moment, he sighed, as he began to leave his message of support for the man he called his pastor. Spinning around in her chair, she felt a small smile crawl onto her face as her concerns were laid to rest. She now had a good idea of how he was going to handle the plight of preteritus. 

Wine and Tears Don't Mix

As quietness began to once again settle into the funeral home, he sighed as he moved about quickly in the morgue, dressing yet another decedent so he could be casketed in the morning for visitation. With his back turned towards the doors leading into the funeral home, he didn't see her slip in silently. Coming up behind him, he startled when she reached around him to hold something down for him.

"I thought you left with the others." he said gently, as he looked up and saw her eyes were red from crying.

"Hmm? Oh yeah, I did. But then I realized that I wanted a drink, and the guys all wanted to go home. My cousin is in PA. Anna can't drink because of the baby and my best friend is out at BW and I don't feel much like driving out there to drink. So I have the bottle," she said, as she held up a large bottle of Blackberry Arbor Mist. "But I don't want to drink alone, because apparently drinking alone makes you a drunk, to which I am not yet." she added, as she looked at him. "So I came back to see if you wanted to join me in having a drink to two."  Tying a knot into the string he was tying, he looked back at her.

"Depends. What are we drinking to?" he asked cautiously, as she began to tear up again. Moving out of his way, as he began to prepare another body to be casketed, she sighed loudly and the father in him determined that it was something serious.

"To the fact that I can't have kids. I want them, but I was told that that probably isn't going to happen." she said weepy, as she pulled a tissue out of her pocket and dabbed her eyes before grabbing the casket and holding it as he swung the body lift over it and lowered the decedent into it, using that few silent moments to figure how he was going to address this.

"Are you sure?" he questioned, as she shook her head. He knew she had been having some medical problems, but he didn't think they were that serious. "What did the doctor say."

"That my symptoms sound like endometriosis and that if it is, I may never be able to have kids." she replied, as he looked at her, the desire to be a father for that split second and hold her creeping into his thoughts. "Even before I wanted to be a funeral director, I've wanted to be a mother. I don't think I've ever wanted anything else so bad before in my life. And now, that may all be taken away." she said, her voice just audible against the noise of the embalming fan.

Realizing that what he was doing, though important, was not as important as her at that moment in time, he nodded his head, picking just the right words so not to make her pain double or even triple. "Come on, let's head upstairs. I can finish this later. He's not being laid out until later tomorrow anyways." he said, as he ushered her in front of him out of the room, closing the door behind them as they went up to the residence. Pulling out two wine glasses, he sighed as they went into the living room and  sat down on the couch. "Just because you may never be able to actually have kids, doesn't mean you still couldn't be a mother. There are tons of options out there for woman in your situation." he said gently as he passed her a glass of wine.

"But it wouldn't be the same," she said sadly, knowing that he was referring to adoption. "I just...I watch my girlfriend all excited about having a baby. How excited she is when he kicks and everything and I'm jealous because she's pregnant and I'm not. She didn't even try. She wasn't the one day and then the next she was. I tell the doctor that the only two things I ever fear is dying of cancer and not being able to have kids, and he tells me that the chances are good that I have some disease that nobody has a cure for. I mean, what the hell is that crap!" she cried, as he shakes his head. He's heard some of that rant before from his own beloved after their first miscarriage. Taking a sip of his wine, he sighs.

"It would be the same except the fact that you didn't wouldn't be giving that baby actual life. But you'd still love that child as if it was your own." he answered, as she looked up at him, her hand holding tightly to her glass. Tears were hanging off her lashes, and her eyes that were already red, were only getting redder as she continued to fight off her tears and failing.

"How would you know? You were able to have kids. You got to feel them when they kicked her. You were there when they were born. How do you know I'd make a good mother to a child that wasn't mine?" she asked, the wine starting to hit her as she began to cry. "What makes you think I could love something that isn't a hundred percent mine?" she whispered.

"Because I know. Because you care. Because you wouldn't give up just because you're told that you won't be able to have a child. Because it's you, and even though it would hurt at first, you'd fall in love with that child and love it and being a mom." he answered calmly as she released the stem of the glass and he took it away. "Besides, with modern medicine, who knows. You may find that he was wrong and you're able to have a baby without any trouble at all. You don't know." he added gently as she looked over at him. "You're young. You're going to worry about that, and you should. It's normal. But getting drunk and crying won't back much of a difference medically." he said, as she laughed slightly, and the hint of a small smile came across her face.

"I can see why you became a funeral director." she said, as she wiped her eyes. "You always know what to say to make someone feel better." she said, as she looked at him, a smile still on her face. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. But now, I'd say it's time for you to head home. There's a lot going on in the morning and I'm going to need to know you can be on the top of your game." he said, as she stood up and shook her head.

"Yes sir." she said, as she grabbed the empty wine glasses and carried them into the kitchen. "What time should I get here in the morning?" she questioned, as she headed for the door.

"Eight thirty if you could. Call when you get home please." he answered, as she nodded her head.

"I will. Good night sir." she said, as she pulled open the door and began to walk out, before she stopped and stuck her head around the corner of the door. "Sir?"

"Yes."

"Thank you." and with that, she was gone. Sighing, he leaned back on the couch and flipped on the news, waiting for her phone call to say she was home, safe and sound.